Have you ever found yourself attracted to someone who is not the typical “type” you would go for? He is not tall, dark, and handsome. He is not average height, with blonde hair, and blue eyes. he is not tanned with dark curly hair and brown eyes. He is not your type in any way, shape, or form that you can see with your naked eye. Are you confused? You have some right to be, especially since you don’t understand what’s going on. We, humans, like patterns because they allow us to feel as if we are in control and we have our mind wrapped around what is going on. When we understand, we feel comfortable. So, why are you baffled as to why you are attracted to this guy who is far from what you could imagine? I am going to go out on a limb and say it is because maybe, for once, you have seen someone for who he is instead of what he looks like. I understand, physical attraction is important but so is deep chemistry. I find it more satisfying when I am attracted to someone whom I don’t instantly find physically attractive. It gives me a chance to see the person from the inside out instead of the other way around.
The reason why making a list of physical attraction is delusional is because it does not give you a chance to see the whole person. Be bold; go for the pot of gold on the inside of the person. Even if you don’t like him as a mate you still have to go with what he possesses inside to really get to know who he is as a whole being.
So, keep your eyes on what is inside. As always, I have a little story to help make a connection here. So I found myself slightly attracted to someone whom I would not say meet the physical criteria of the “usual” for me. I would not say he is not good looking, but that I did not notice it right off the bat. However, because the instant physical appeal was not there to distract me, I was able to get to know him for the whole person that he is. I began to notice things like his aura, his calm spirit, his energy, his eagerness to help, his generosity, and his all together gentleness. In the midst of all of that, I also began to notice how attractive he is once the whole package was revealed to me. This goes to show how attraction as a whole is more than what meets the eye. Beauty does in fact belong to the beholder, the one with eyes that penetrate the surface in order to get a clear view of it.
Keeping your eyes on what is inside allows you to get your hands on a treasure chest that will never grow old, winkle, or diminish with time. Many times we run into trouble falling in love with the wrong person because we focused on the outside to guide us through the relationship and then realize we don’t like what we could not see once it finally surfaced. Other times, we let go of someone that could have been a perfect match for us if we had taken the time to get to know him from the inside out. I believe, similar to faith, love works from the inside out. Once we get over how physically appealing someone is and allow ourselves to get a glimpse of his inside, that usually determines how we ultimately feel about the person. I mean, let’s be honest, no one wants to be with good looking abuser, a good looking irresponsible man, a good looking lazy man, a good looking selfish man- you get the point.