When you learn to stop looking at being single as if it is a curse, you will be able to realize that singleness is a gift. It is an opportunity that you only possess while you are single, so you better find a way to enjoy it. Are there days when I feel tired of being single? Yes! However, on those days, God never ceases to remind me by bringing something to show me that maybe, just maybe, I am not quite ready for what I think I am asking for. When I hear other women talk about the lack of privacy, the level of tiredness that comes with taking care of husbands and kids after working a long day at work, I revert back to loving being single for the time being. Although I believe I am ready or that I feel ready to take care of a household, I can’t help but feel happy about being single when moms are complaining about being tired or having no time for themselves for weeks at a time. I know, it is not the same for every family. Right now, I enjoy walking into my condo and plopping down on my couch for however long I want without being disturbed. I enjoy the freedom of being single. I have the freedom to do everything I want, go anywhere I want, and spend however long I want in once place or another. I know some of these things may sound a bit selfish or that maybe I am enjoying my singleness a little too much, but that is alright with me. I am not selfish, I simply decided that I was not going to make myself miserable until my Boaz gets here.
Here are some things being single allows you to do that marriage does not or they are more difficult to do while married
1. Have more time to devote yourself to God
- If you are a Christian, this is exactly why I mentioned that being single is a gift. It allows you time to pray more, read your bible more and spend more time with God. You can add daily devotionals to your routine. You have time to yourself to read self improving books like the bible. Do you see why being single is not a curse, but an opportunity to find yourself, complete yourself, identify who you are in Christ? That way by the time you meet the man God has been preparing you for, he will not come to complete you or make you whole. He will not come to make you but to improve with you. Ladies and gentlemen, don’t waste this precious time you have. Find ways to make the best of it. This time will not come back again even if you happen to find yourself single again ( it will not be the same, nothing ever comes back around the exact same way as the first time).
- Scripture references; 1 Corinthians 7:1, 8 and 35, Hosea 2:19-20, Colossians 2:10
2. Take random trips
- Take road trips, but don’t stop there. I like taking road trips so that was the first thing that came to my mind. If you rather do something else, then why not. Do you realize that time is in your hands? I know you have to work and you may already have plenty of things to keep you busy. The point I am trying to make here is not to find things to keep you busy, but to find things to do that you genuinely enjoy.
3. Be free to leave and come back as you please
- Ok. A lot of times I don’t have anywhere to go. Maybe you don’t either. When I do have places to go, I don’t have to worry about finding a babysitter or worry about the time I have to go back home. If I want to take a trip out of no where, I can.
4. Stay up late, go to bed early-your choice
- It is not that I stay up late or always go to bed early but I love the fact that I have the option. This option may no be available so every now and then I stay up late and make sure to go to bed at a decent time. Sleep now, later on it may become a thing of the past.
5. Sleep in complete peace
- I love my sleep. I love my sleep. I love my sleep. I am pretty sure you’ve gotten it by now. I love my sleep. Anyone who knows me knows not to wake me up for no good reason or keep me from going to sleep at my desired time. I understand as parents you have to make sacrifices for your children and among those sacrifices are losing sleep or being awoken from a deep sleep. If you want me to be your friend, do not wake me up. Even when I am the reason I cannot fall asleep or stay asleep, I want to beat myself up. To be quite honest, I am not looking forward to waking up in the middle of the night to feed and console a crying child. Ahhh, I bet you did not think of this when you thought you wanted to be married and have kids.
- See, problems are part of life and you cannot avoid them. We think being single is a problem that can be solved by getting married. We get married and have kids, that package comes with a different set of problems. I have heard married women say how much they wish they had enjoyed their singleness more. You should listen to married women who envy the time you have, the time you are complaining about. It’s not that they want to be single again, but that they wish they enjoyed the free time they had a little more. Enjoy your singleness because you will not have that time again once you are married with children.
6. Privacy, privacy
- I don’t know about you, but I love my privacy. I don’t have anything to hide. I love having time alone to read a good book in quietness or watch my favorite TV show without any interruptions. Again, I am not trying to make singleness seems like a selfish state to be in, I am stating what I am able to do and have while I am actively waiting. Since I am not waiting passively, I get to enjoy things misery free.
Don’t think of being single as a curse, a lonely state, a bad thing, or that it means something is wrong with you-none of that. You have got to learn to be whole, happy, complete and together in your singleness. See yourself as a holder of a precious gift. Use that gift to the best of your ability. If your singleness bothers you, you need to ask yourself some questions and find out why your own company is not enough. If you can’t stand yourself, how will someone else be able to stand you?
Enjoy your singleness,